Maryland Bridesmaids

I was joined by my three maryland bridesmaids at David's Bridal in Bowie. After selecting through various shades of purples and styles...we've narrowed it down!!! My sister wasn't able to make it last minute. But -- I think it worked out better that way. I almost debated adding in the choice of shorter dresses; but I dont think so.

The Winners:

and Danielle is torn between these two ::

Save the Dates Have Arrived!

Such an exciting day to have Jimmy bring in a big box...knowing its the Save the Dates!

Out of State Bridesmaids

Half my Bridal Party lives out of state : Jenn, Jenn, Shannon, Ally and Cassie. In order to help them find a dress -- I needed to make requirements manageable for all different states [Georgia, California, Colorado, New York and North Carolina]. For some; David's Bridal isn't even very local. Luckily; all of them are flexible and easy to work with.

Jenn and Jenn were the first two to go try dresses on and send me their photos. Surprisingly both did not like the style I preferred [which made me feel so much better about not requiring a specific dress style].

These two were the winners ::

Save the Dates in the Making

Jenn has had tons of great ideas for Save the Dates -- she is super creative and crafty. Here are some of her awesome ideas.

She had at least 5 other ones -- but we skyped with those. She had tied rope...ribbon...made ones that could open, laid flat...she was really going for it. 

BUT! She decided on an idea and created it. She's wrapping up the bunch tonight! Cannot wait to get them in the mail and then send them out to everyone! Very grateful to have this gifted to us

They Said "I do"

My girls have all gotten their cards and have said "yes" or "I accept" or "Im honored" or "I do". Which makes me beyond happy. I knew they wouldn't miss it but I also know how life is these days. CRAZY and MONEY HUNGRY! So, I didnt want anyone feeling obligated.

I got some photos of their cards -- and a couple calls with excitement. I love my ladies and Im honestly so thrilled to have each of them by my side. Each of them have their own special history with me.

Ivanna Michelle Melendez - My little baby; well, only sister. I grew up being such a jerk to her - since I found her beyond bratty. However, she looked up to me like no other. Leaving me notes and even saying aloud - how much she wanted to be like me. I used to laugh it off -- because she basically sounded as if she was off the Full House series. As we grew up - we grew apart. She became a stunningly attractive teenager, with her own friends and crazy lifestyle. When we both hit college years - we slowly drifted back together with bumps along the way. She's seen every side of me, all my appearances, boyfriends, love lost and more. She's been there since the beginning. She means the world to me. I love seeing the Mom she's become and being the GodMother for my nephew is such an honor. I love her to pieces and I am so glad she'll be standing beside me as my Maid of Honor.

Jennifer Anne Pariseau Wilson - My soon-to-be Sister in Law. We met back in 2009 - as I began dating her brother. We bonded instantly, which was surprising. She lived out of state and we only saw each other a few times a year. In just these short years; she's seen EVERY up and down between Jimmy and I; and our own lives have been such a roller coaster. She actually reminds me a lot of my little sister; which shouldn't be surprising. I stood by her side as her Maid of Honor in Egypt as she married Peter. She's been a best friend and sister since 2009 -- and I am so happy it'll be official.

Natasha Paleau [Soon to Be Melendez!] - My soon-to-be Sister in Law. I met her before Jimmy was apart of my life. She fit right into our family; and took our family right into hers. Natasha has gone through such a personal journey and it's been amazing seeing every part of that. Natasha is one of the best people for me to confide into. She was among one of my first phone calls to tell about my pregnancy with Xavier. Knowing my brother is the happiest he's ever been - means beyond everything to me. To share that happiness by knowing and growing with Natasha -- is incredible.  am truly blessed to have such a genuine friend.

Allison Jennifer Suarez [Soon to be Veraga] - My Best Cousin. Since she was born - we were closer than sisters. To the point where we shared all the same clothes; if we weren't already dressed alike by our mother's; and fought like cats and dogs. She's always been the strongheaded one out of the two of us. She knows what's best...and isn't afraid to say so. She's the Godmother to Xavier; and I am so honored to have her apart of his life the way she is. Allison and I have gone through a mess of stuff - even from the long distance of NYC and MD. I am so excited to be standing by her side next year as her Maid of Honor...excuse me...MATRON of Honor!!!

Cassandra Lee Dozier - Best Friends. THIS CHICK. My little sister from another mother. We've seen the Good, the Bad and the Ugly since 2005. The Klan. Enough said! No but in all seriousness; Cassandra has listened to me for hours upon end for the past few years. Traveling up here to visit and going down to SC/NC to see her has been so exciting. She might be younger than me...by nearly two years...but she's given me so much advice; she could write a book. I love knowing her daughters and only wish I could be closer. I even took her to Hooters for her first time when she turned 16! ha.

Shannon Grace McClanahan - Best Friends. We met in High School and the rest is honestly a huge blur of hair dye, boys boys boys and parties. We share a huge love of music; and men. Between dealing with crazy chicks and hunting down ex's...we've had our share of memories. But; with all the changes and moving - she's been there for me without hesitation. She was my first customer when I opened the Unknown Artist; one of the first models for my first Studio; my first friend to give Xavier a gift [before he was born]...and just one hell of a friend. I couldn't imagine my life without her.

Danielle Kimberly O'Connor - Best Friends. We met back in 2011. She came to our place in Arnold for a Wii party I was hosting. She was super quiet but beyond friendly. I pushed my way into her life and we hit it off right away. Danielle has been there for me beyond words. We lived together for a short while in another part of Arnold. We attempted a fun girls trip to OC - dang weather! She got Jimmy and I on horseback - which is something we definitely want to do again. She helped put together my Baby Shower for Xavier last year; and made my Breakfast at Tiffany's idea come to life. She's been a great Auntie for Xavier!!

Jennifer Aschliman - Best Friends. We met back in 2006 - at her Church. One of our friends attended there and took me along. I ended up hanging out at her old apartment and we hit a club in Baltimore. After that....it was YEARS until we saw each other again. She came to my studio/store in Annapolis to show me some pinup outfit ideas she had for our session together. We sat talking for HOURS in the lounge. She's taken me under her wing ever since. Looking out for me through all my personal struggles; even letting me sleep on her couch for a few weeks over the summer I ended up pregnant. I was honored to stand by her side as one of her Bridesmaids last summer. Missing her lots now that she's out in California.

Courtney Blaire Rowe - Best Friends. We've known each other since High School - although a grade level apart. We were in the same Dance Class. I didn't see her for over five years -- til she ended up coming over to party for Halloween when we were living in Edgewater. We rang in the New Year together -- and it all has been one big party since then. Between random roadtrips to Ocean City - to planning out my lovely pregnancies...she's been the one to witness both pregnancy tests turning positive. HA! It's great to know she's had my back ; as well as my relationships back....all this time.

All in all - I chose these nine ladies... because each of them means a lot to me, respects and honors my relationship with Jimmy, and in their own way has their OWN friendship with Jimmy. To me; thats what a true friend is. I love these girls; beyond words.

PANIC: Out of BUDGET!

We are officially out of our budget.

We got the important things handled....with our $9,000 budget we have ::

A Church
Rehearsal Dinner
Pre Martial Classes
A Venue for Reception
All Tables/Chairs/Linens
Buffet Catered Dinner with Appetizers/Champagne Toast
Overnight Accommodations [complimentary]
Anniversary Dinner [complimentary]
DJ
Photographer
Makeup
Cash Bar

We have $75.00 left over. Essentially...that'll be eaten up somewhere with the above.

But now what...

I still need :

A Dress
Lingerie
Hair
Nails/Waxing
Bouquet
Invitations
Save the Dates
Cake

I would love :

Boudoir Photos
Dance Lessons
Bridesmaid Cards
Transportation
Decoration -- nothing big but SOMETHING

WHO SAVED THE DAY??

• Jenn -- Save the Dates and Invites as our gift
• Paula -- Created Bridesmaid Cards
• Amanda -- Baking a cupcake cake/cake [only charging for supplies!]
• Danielle -- Hair Stylist as my gift
• Jimmy -- Dance Lessons as my Valentine's Day Gift

Will you be my Bridesmaid?

I've never liked the idea of simply calling my future Bridal Party. While; thats how Ive been asked before....and there's nothing wrong with it; its not my style. I love doing a little something extra. Especially if that includes sparkles!!!

I reached out to Paula; my Future Mother in Law -- and asked for her help! She created EXACTLY what I was envisioning and with haste! I spent the morning putting them together and throwing them out in the mailbox!! Anxiously awaiting everyone to get theirs!!

So many ideas; so many restrictions!

I'm in love with Weddings and Pinterest. Between those two - my mind is just overflowing with ideas. The reality of having nearly no money to create a fun wedding has hit me. I almost decided that PHOTOGRAPHY wasn't worth the investment. That crazy thought came and went very quickly.

I know at the end of the day; photos are what I will have to remember this beautiful time. Not the bubbles left on the table! ha.

Bridesmaid Shopping

So... Courtney offered the idea of going Dress Shopping. She intended it to be for Bridal Shopping - but theres no way my 7 month pregnant ass was going dress shopping. Lets be serious. I wont be attempting that feat until July. [MINIMUM!]

I asked Ivanna and Danielle to join us; in hopes to have the Ombre idea tested out. We picked a date...but the timing as a bit off with everyone. Each girl had something she needed to do.

A bit of drama sparked...and it ended up being just Courtney and Ivanna. Which was fine - It'd still give me an idea of what I may or may not be looking for.

Courtney and I took to the racks -- and I began pulling down colors that looked similar to what I had wanted. I tried to guesstimate their sizes and find various styles of dresses for them to try on. Soon enough; Ivanna had arrived and we hit the fitting room. They shared a room and began trying on dresses.

I saw the discouragement of them needing bigger sizes; but dresses are never true to size. Thats the annoying part of the process. The girls put the dresses on and the colors didn't seem right...nor did the styles we found. I told them to come out and maybe let me see them from afar. Not much better.

Something wasn't right. It was also hard trying to do this with only two girls; know its a 3 color ombre effect. Plus; they didnt have their sizes in the right purple shades. Which is obnoxious...you'd think this store would carry more sizes/colors/styles knowing more than ONE bridesmaid is going to be in a wedding. OH WELL.

I asked them to get dressed so we could regroup.

I then told them -- maybe Purple wasn't the right idea. Ivanna immediately nixed out RED [my fave color]. I told them...find me your two favorite color dresses and bring them to me. Ivanna came back with baby blue and pink...Courtney came back with Coral and Turquoise. They began kinda bickering about which colors could or would work better...and styles of dresses were complete opposite. In that moment...I felt like we'll DEFINITELY be getting various styles in dresses.

For me its easier and I think more appropriate for a Wedding. These girls are going to be spending over 100$ on a dress; that more than likely they will wear one time. I wont choose a crazy shade nor an unflattering style. if these are my best girls then they deserve more than that. Im also having a very large bridal party...with a variety of skin, eye and hair color - as well as boob, height, weight and shape differences.

I decided to start over, mentally. I picked out 3 dresses and sent them back into the fitting room. One style looked STUNNING -- but it was over 250$. Figures. The other style was a winner too; BOTH girls liked it and looked great. I was thrilled.

Courtney voiced she was overwhelmed. I felt pretty calm but it was late, my phone was dying and I was hungry. So -- we got the girls changed up and headed out.

Overall. It helped me to do this...would I say it was successful; not completely. However; it gave me a starting point. Not only on picking dresses/colors...but realizing; the drama, issues and all I have ahead of me...WISH ME LUCK.

Picking a Venue

This has been SO hard. I wanted a barn or open field...but between:

• Catering Options versus On Site Only
• Hour Restrictions
• Super HIGH site fees
• Dates Unavailable

Choosing a Maid Of Honor

This is a really big deal. Not only because I have a close set of girls but because each one could honestly be my Maid of Honor for their own reasons. However. I refuse to let guilt or anything similar guide me in my decision making.

A Maid[or Matron] of Honor should be:

1. Your ultimate friend/companion
2. Someone who has shared the Ups and Downs of yours and their life
3. Someone who can be serious AND fun
4. Someone who knows and loves your entire family
5. Someone who knows and loves your Fiance
6. Someone who knows, RESPECTS and honors your relationship with your Fiance
7. Someone who is either local/readily available or very helpful from long distance
8. Someone who can handle your mood swings and basket of emotions from now to the "I do".
9. Someone who gets along with others - and all of your other bridesmaids.
10. Someone who will handle the BIG duties and help distribute the small duties on the BIG DAY.
11. Someone who is assertive enough to get things handled.
12. Someone who is like [or is] a Sister to you.
13. Someone who will take note of your ideas/wishes -- and help them come to life [as close as possible]
14. Someone who is dependable and reliable without many other obligations.
15. Someone who is optimistic and cheerful [no one needs depressed or whiney support]


My sister - met each one of those expectations. I know a few of my Bridesmaids were a bit bummed - one even told me upfront. I felt bad. I was VERY close to not having a Maid of Honor...but that isn't me.

I knew I needed someone who doesn't tear down my Fiance [even on his worst days]. This is his big Day too -- and BOTH our wishes should be respected and honored.

Im thrilled to have her stand by my side on my wedding day.

xoxo

Church or Outdoor Venue?

I'm the type of person who could get married anywhere. I'll find the beauty in the scenery. However; I was unbelievably torn about where to get married. I've always imagined getting married in a Church. Jimmy is completely set on a Church as well.

However, I'm in love with the way Pinterest highlights outdoor weddings. I love rustic decor...the idea of being out in nature. Luckily; not only does the time of year effect this but our budget does too.

Church seemed to be the best fit; aside from not actually having one for us as a family. We both are Christian and I was preferring a Catholic church. I spent weeks messaging, calling and speaking with multiple churches. Everything from where Xavier and Jayce were baptized to where I taught Bible Study for kids... most were either outrageously priced or not the right feeling.

I decided to go with my friend Amber's advice of contacting New Covenant Church in Arnold. I had been there with some friends back in high school. It was a nice church - but modern. We were hoping for Traditional.

We emailed back and forth for a couple weeks; the price seemed right, his view on marriage matched mine - so I set up a meeting.

Xavier and I drove together; Jimmy was coming from work. We met the Pastor [Ed] and got along great. He didn't judge us for having Xavier while not being married. He even gave me advice on a photographer he knows. He took us around the Church.

He explained the only stipulation would be No Sex. I thought this would be a deal breaker for Jimmy. We have a very healthy sexual relationship. However, I took this as two blessings. One; to see if we could remove that for an extended period of time and use our energy/passion elsewhere. Two; there will be NO opportunity for me to get pregnant BEFORE we get married [which was a big fear].

Pastor Ed even offered to give us our classes free of charge; and Xavier was welcome to join us. It felt good to feel apart of God in his eyes; even though we had done things outside of The Book. As we said our goodbyes; I asked Jimmy how he felt. HE WAS ALL IN - didn't even want to see another Church.

We made our first official decision!